PUSH THE THROTTLE Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 BREAKING NEWS!! Kerry Requests Silver Star and Purple Heart After Piloting Swift Boat Through New Orleans WASHINGTON, DC --- John Kerry contacted the Pentagon today to request a Silver Star for a recent swift boat mission he ran through the streets of New Orleans. While the Pentagon claims the mission was unauthorized, Kerry claims it was a secret mission approved by the highest levels of the government. "I clearly remember listening to the radio and hearing President Bush deny that swift boats were in New Orleans," said Kerry. "And there I was on a swift boat in New Orleans. Dodging bullets. Scanning the shore for enemy fire and mortar attack. The band aid on my hand covers a wound I received while moving too quickly on deck for a photo op and scraping against the railing." Kerry also applied for the award of his fourth Purple Heart. Sean Penn tried to join Kerry on his own swift boat, but it sank before leaving dock. Penn forgot to put the plug in the bottom of the boat and refused to stuff his Communist flag in the hole to prevent flooding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cotton eyed Joe Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 BREAKING NEWS!!Kerry Requests Silver Star and Purple Heart After Piloting Swift Boat Through New Orleans WASHINGTON, DC --- John Kerry contacted the Pentagon today to request a Silver Star for a recent swift boat mission he ran through the streets of New Orleans. While the Pentagon claims the mission was unauthorized, Kerry claims it was a secret mission approved by the highest levels of the government. "I clearly remember listening to the radio and hearing President Bush deny that swift boats were in New Orleans," said Kerry. "And there I was on a swift boat in New Orleans. Dodging bullets. Scanning the shore for enemy fire and mortar attack. The band aid on my hand covers a wound I received while moving too quickly on deck for a photo op and scraping against the railing." Kerry also applied for the award of his fourth Purple Heart. Sean Penn tried to join Kerry on his own swift boat, but it sank before leaving dock. Penn forgot to put the plug in the bottom of the boat and refused to stuff his Communist flag in the hole to prevent flooding. 423874[/snapback] Instead of a Purple Heart or a Silver Star, those two should be awarded the Rainbow Triangle. Sean Penn "pulling" people out of NO into his boat....I think there was room for one person in his boat due to the camera crew trying to capture every moment of his quasi heroism. Everytime I see that guy I think of that scene in that movie he made where he played the idiot and he just screams on and on "I AM SAM I AM SAM I AM SAM" . Honestly I was hoping he was going to fall face first into that shitty water and come down with some sort of moron eating bacteria infection. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hilarious Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 Honestly I was hoping he was going to fall face first into that shitty water and come down with some sort of moron eating bacteria infection. WOrd! Where was Jessie Jackson during all this goins ons? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigboybanshee Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 Here's what Kerry was really doing..... Downing brews with Lootie!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cotton eyed Joe Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 Here's what Kerry was really doing..... Downing brews with Lootie!!! 423919[/snapback] LMFAO They're juss chillin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tOj Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brooke Posted October 7, 2005 Report Share Posted October 7, 2005 sean penn is a great humanitarian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cotton eyed Joe Posted October 8, 2005 Report Share Posted October 8, 2005 sean penn is a great humanitarian 423948[/snapback] LMFAO I can hear him saying I AM SAM I AM SAM I AM SAM! while he's doing it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
batoutofshell Posted October 8, 2005 Report Share Posted October 8, 2005 Where was Jessie Jackson during all this goins ons? He was either making more iligitamate chilren for the welfare system to raise and pay for or He was doing a concert with Lootie and the blowfish! Damn thats funny you guys crack me up!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motoman991 Posted October 8, 2005 Report Share Posted October 8, 2005 lmfao this kind of stuff just makes my day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
locogato11283 Posted October 8, 2005 Report Share Posted October 8, 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Rebel Posted October 10, 2005 Report Share Posted October 10, 2005 Here's what Kerry was really doing..... Downing brews with Lootie!!! 423919[/snapback] them boys are all over the Heiny...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PUSH THE THROTTLE Posted October 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted October 10, 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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