BFISH Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington Chemistry mid term. The answer was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, which is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. BONUS QUESTION: IS HELL EXOTHERMIC (GIVES OFF HEAT) OR ENDOTHERMIC (ABSORBS HEAT)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed), or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: _______________________ First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul goes to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic, and will not freeze. _______________________ The student received the only 'A' given Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PolyKarbon Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 My only goal in life is to be as clever as that guy. Rediculously funy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toomey Banshee Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 Nice find, pretty funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holyman Posted November 10, 2004 Report Share Posted November 10, 2004 I have waited for such wisdom for years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
locogato11283 Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 that dudes fuckin smart Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banshee76179 Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 that dudes fuckin smart 279394[/snapback] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tithead Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 that funny shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallrat Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 Pretty impressive if this guy actually wrote it for his final. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stclark04 Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 Haha, pretty good answer. Id give him a A Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledofthezep Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 Damn good answer. English was always my best subject for some reason. But I've always been mathematically challenged. I imagine I would have had a smartass answer myself, but not quite as well written or long winded. But hell yes, the guy should have gotten his Bonus points. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. TeresaBanyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic, and will not freeze. That shit cracks me up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boonman Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 Very interesting!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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